


Comeback Villain of the Year

by BadBlond099



Series: OTP Shameless Smutfics [2]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DC Year of the Villain, Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Basically PWP, Blow Jobs, Embarrassment Kink, Light Masochism, M/M, Sex Pollen, Wall Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-16
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:55:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22282972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BadBlond099/pseuds/BadBlond099
Summary: “Okay, so if I’m right, you drunk-booty-texted me while partying it up with super villains everywhere, and now you’re kicking me out because you already have a headache?”“Would you just shut up? Geez.” Jason opened the envelope to find a little card with a red lipstick kiss on the front. “‘For tonight’s winner,’” he muttered before opening it and getting a puff of green in his face. He dropped the card and Dick hurriedly retrieved it, reading the inside.“‘Because you seemed like you had a crowbar shoved up your ass, Ivy ‘n I thought you could use a night to unwind with someone special. Enjoy.’” Dick watched as Jason gagged on the mystery gas. “Oh…Jay?” Jason continued to wheeze and gasp, his face reddening steadily. Dick could guess what little surprise Harley and Ivy had left for him. “Hey, it’s going to be okay. We’re used to this. Just take it easy. Breathe through it.” Dick put his hands on Jason’s shoulders only for the larger man to lean against him. “W-whoa! Jay!”“Not…Not used to it,” he mumbled.“What do you mean you’re not used to it? Batman Associate 101: always have your immunizations and anti-bodies up to date!”“Not a...Batman Associate…”
Relationships: Dick Grayson/Jason Todd, Harley Quinn/Poison Ivy
Series: OTP Shameless Smutfics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1583449
Comments: 13
Kudos: 265





	Comeback Villain of the Year

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, needed an outlet for my Jay/Dick ship nonsense. Fighting my way out of a few corners I dug myself into with my other stories, so used this to get a little tension out.
> 
> No need to read anything else to accompany this, just keeping these all under one work in order to categorize them.
> 
> Once again! Gag Reel featured at the end to mock the ridiculous nature of this story! Very brief Harley/Ivy featured in there, but nothing really happens so the couple is mentioned but this is strictly Male/Male (with a brief simple moment with the girls on the outtakes cuz I just love em).
> 
> And for anyone who needs some background, Jason Todd won a different kind of fan vote in 2019 (and it didn't get him killed! Yaaaay!). This story takes place after the award ceremony, which was a ridiculous concept anyways, so don't take this too seriously, okay?
> 
> Anywho, enjoy!

Jason pressed the release switches on each side of his facemask and barely had the sense to set it on the coffee table. He held the trophy in his hand, gripping it so tightly that he could feel the rough edges of it trying to cut into his palm through the fingerless glove. He was an idiot. He shouldn’t have gone. That was…It was just…

“What’s that?”

The gun was in his hand without a single wasted movement, pointed right at the intruder’s forehead. He lowered it just as quickly as he’d put it up. “What the actual fuck are you doing here?” he snapped, clicking the safety on his gun and setting it down next to his facemask.

Dick’s hands were still raised from the sudden threat. “Uh. I was just…are you wearing a tuxedo over your usual gear?”

Jason dropped his hood and fumbled with the buttons on the suit jacket. “So what if I am?”

“Just curious. I mean…Weren’t the Doommies tonight?”

Jason stiffened. “The what?”

“You know, that stupid day of the year when the villains take a night off to celebrate each other at one of Lex’s old facilities. We never bother busting it up because, well, EVERYONE shows up and who knows what kind of chaos could ensue. Also supposedly they tip the catering staff well.”

Jason thought back to the few dead waiters who hadn’t lasted the night. “Yeah. Here’s a tip for them: don’t serve criminals…and Slade likes his fucking shrimp.”

“What was that last part?”

“Look, I’m not in the mood.” He picked up the hanger he’d left on the table and put the jacket on it before even bothering to get the vest and tie off.

Dick just stood by, watching him work off his unusual outfit additions. “Wouldn’t it have been easier to just…wear the suit and include your mask?”

“If you think for one second that I was going into a den of super villains without all of my equipment, you’re dumber than I give you credit for.”

“Well…I don’t see your sword or…you know, the other thing.”

“You can say crowbar, jackass,” Jason mumbled. “And the crowbar looked tacky. As for my sword…” one flourish of his hand and the blade appeared, “…the All-Blade is always with me.”

Dick scoffed. “Look, it’s not that I’m afraid to say ‘crowbar,’ it’s that it’s kind of messed up that you use one as a weapon.”

“Don’t worry. I don’t beat up young boys with it.”

“That’s not what I—”

“Look, Dickwad, I don’t know why you’re here. I don’t care why you’re here. I’m tired. It’s been a night. I just want to relax.”

Dick shrugged. “I mean, I can help with that.”

Jason scoffed. “Yeah. The interrogation is super relaxing.” The All-Blade vanished and he was finally down to just his pants and the armored shirt with his latest take on the red bat symbol.

Dick crossed his arms over the blue bird on his chest and mumbled, “I don’t see why you even texted me then.”

“What? I didn’t text you.”

Dick held out his burner phone, annoyed that he’d have to get yet another since Jason got the number for that one as well…supposedly…Jason took it and looked at the message. “‘Meet me tonight at 11 and wear something tight’? Seriously? That doesn’t even sound like me.”

Dick shrugged. “I’m new to this whole booty call thing. Sue me.”

Jason tossed the phone back at him. “That’s a lie if I ever heard one. And your idea of tight is your Nightwing suit?”

“I wasn’t sure what else that could mean!”

Jason rolled his eyes and moved to retrieve his suit jacket to put away in a closet only to notice something poking out of the breast pocket. “When did this get here?”

“Okay, so if I’m right, you drunk-booty-texted me while partying it up with super villains everywhere, and now you’re kicking me out because you already have a headache?”

“Would you just shut up? Geez.” Jason opened the envelope to find a little card with a red lipstick kiss on the front. “‘For tonight’s winner,’” he muttered before opening it and getting a puff of green in his face. He dropped the card and Dick hurriedly retrieved it, reading the inside.

“‘Because you seemed like you had a crowbar shoved up your ass, Ivy ‘n I thought you could use a night to unwind with someone special. Enjoy.’” Dick watched as Jason gagged on the mystery gas. “Oh…Jay?” Jason continued to wheeze and gasp, his face reddening steadily. Dick could guess what little surprise Harley and Ivy had left for him. “Hey, it’s going to be okay. We’re used to this. Just take it easy. Breathe through it.” Dick put his hands on Jason’s shoulders only for the larger man to lean against him. “W-whoa! Jay!”

“Not…Not used to it,” he mumbled.

“What do you mean you’re not used to it? Batman Associate 101: always have your immunizations and anti-bodies up to date!”

“Not…Not a Batman Associate…”

Dick blinked a few times. In his mind Jason was always part of the team. Even when he wasn’t…even when there was just no way they could agree, he was still family. But Bruce…Bruce had made his feelings about Jason’s recent actions clear and, having dinner with the leaders of the underworld just seemed to solidify the situation…Especially since he apparently won an award, which meant he was well acknowledged as a villain in his own rite. “You’re not up to date on Ivy’s pollen immunizations.” It was more of a statement than a question as Jason leaned more and more against Dick. “Damnit, Jay! You should have at least been building up your resistance!”

“‘S’not like I’ve got her sex shit on hand.”

To Dick’s surprise, Jason’s hand slid along the sleek armor over Dick’s abdomen, pressing hard enough to stir something in him. “Well now. I thought you wanted me to get out of here?”

“Still do,” Jason growled, though he went from leaning against Dick to pushing him into the nearby wall. “Y’re just in my way.”

Amusing as it was for Dick to see Jason so flustered for a change, he knew how bad Ivy’s pollen could be when working at full strength. Jason probably wanted to be alone. “Look, I’ll get out of your hair, let you do what you need to. Just give me a call when you’re feeling better. Just so I can know that they didn’t poison you or some—”

Jason’s right hand landed smack against the wall just by Dick’s head, making his heart leap into his throat. “Fuck you.”

“Jay what are you—”

Jason leaned flush against Dick, making him flatten out against the wall as Jason rested his forehead on Dick’s shoulder. “I…I need this…”

Dick’s face lit up, feeling the hard-on Jason was sporting pressing hard enough against him that he could feel the pressure through the light-weight armor of his suit. “As uh, nice as it is to hear you say that for a change—ah!” Jason began sucking on Dick’s jawline, just above the armor covering his neck. “Ffffuuuucking hell, Jay, you KNOW how long Ivy’s pollen can last. It’s not normal. I can’t keep up with what you ne-heeed!” Jason bit Dick’s earlobe before gently grinding the soft flesh between his teeth.

Jason knew what Dick was referring to; the first time he’d been hit by Ivy’s pollen was (according to Bruce) an important learning experience. He had proceeded to spend the next few hours desperately chasing orgasm after orgasm, feeling like his body would catch fire from the sheer heat he felt if he didn’t rub one out. Any normal person, even someone with a high sex drive like Dick could have, would NOT be able to keep up.

But something in him just didn’t care as he found the hidden zipper at Dick’s collar and forced it down his back.

“J-Jay! Damnit, you can’t just—”

“Call Bruce,” Jason growled, finding what handhold he could to work Dick’s suit off a little more, allowing him to feel that skin to skin contact that the pollen had him craving. “Your suit was removed wrong. You know he’s been alerted.”

Dick began to recognize the danger that he was in, and he tried to push Jason away only to have his wrists caught by Jason’s hands and forced up against the wall over his head. “Jay, you don’t want to do this.”

Jason finally caved to impulse and laughed breathily right by Dick’s ear. “I SO want to do this. You’re the one with the choice; either call Bruce and tell him you’re fine so that I can fuck you until you can’t walk—” Dick swallowed a lump in his throat, “—or don’t call him. Let him come and rescue you. You’ll just have to face the humiliation of your precious Daddy Bat catching you in the embrace of your little brother.”

Both options were cruel, and both made heat pool in Dick’s stomach. How dare his libido betray him at a time like this.

Still, no matter what Jason had in mind, the last thing he wanted was to be caught in such a compromising position by Bruce. So, he used his eyes to select the communication option in his field of vision (Barbara had updated everyone’s masks so that communication could be completely hands free. Jason wasn’t supposed to know that, but by the fact that he shifted so that both of Dick’s wrists were kept firmly in one hand, he could assume Jason had figured it out).

Damian’s face suddenly came into view, layering over Jason’s in Dick’s field of vision.

[Grayson! Explain the alarm that we just received this instant!]

Jason grinned darkly, his grip on Dick’s wrists getting even tighter. “Well, well. If it isn’t the little—”

“I’M FINE!” Dick all but squeaked, making Jason wince and Damian tilt his head slightly in confusion.

[You sound far from fine. Is there someone there with you? Are you in danger? I can be there in less than ten minutes.]

The thought of Bruce walking in on him and Jason was bad enough. Damian? Dick couldn’t live that down.

And the thought made his stomach twist and his body betray him. He was hot. Unbearably hot. Maybe not at Jason’s level, but enough to be uncomfortable. Enough to wish his suit and Jason’s clothes were completely out of the way. This was not a kink he wanted to know that he had.

“I’m—” he cleared his throat to keep his voice even “—fine. Had to navigate the sewers a little tonight.” Jason smirked and repaid Dick’s flimsy lie by pulling the neck armor away just enough to let him sink his teeth into Dick’s collarbone. “Nnnnot a fun way to spend the evening. Just wanted out of my suit as quickly as possible.”

“I can make that happen,” Jason said in a growl, reaching behind to find the zipper and drag it down lower and lower until it was resting just above Dick’s ass.

[I hear someone, Grayson. If you’re in danger, just give me the signal and I’ll be right there.]

“Go on. Tell him who’s got you,” Jason teased, slowly sliding his fingers along Dick’s spine, threatening to dip them into the suit and into his ass.

“Lil’ D, there is NO emergency and if you track me, so help me, I will tell the Titans about the time you cried watching Marley and Me!”

Horny and drugged as Jason was, even he let go of Dick’s wrists and buried his face against Dick’s shoulder to stifle his laughter over that revelation.

[YOU SAID YOU’D NEVER BRING THAT UP AGAIN!]

“It was a false alarm, end of story!” Dick said with authority, as if he still had a shred of dignity given his position. “Now hang up before I give Jon a call!”

Damian disconnected the line before Dick could get another word in and Jason took a step back, peeling his own shirt off. “You have ten seconds to get that stupid thing off before I set off a few more alarms.”

Dick didn’t need to be told twice. He slipped out of his Nightwing suit and tossed it over the back of Jason’s couch. Upon popping his head out of his shirt, Jason scoffed. Dick knew how much the mess bothered him, but at the moment he was too distracted to remedy the situation.

Upon freeing himself from his suit, though, Dick came to realize that they weren’t exactly on even ground. He was left in a jockstrap and cup, the likes of which he was eager to remove since his manhood was already pressing against it, trying to get free. Meanwhile, Jason had just slipped the belt out of his pants and was eagerly undoing the button and zipper in order to free himself as quickly as possible.

“H-hey, this doesn’t seem all that—”

Jason forced Dick against the wall again, stealing kisses that took the breath right out of Dick’s lungs. Within seconds he felt drunk on Jason’s heat, only to get abruptly shocked when Jason’s hands settled just under Dick’s ass, hoisting him up by his thighs so that his feet weren’t on the floor anymore.

Only then did the situation really click for Dick.

“Jay, Jay, wait!”

Jason lined his cock up with Dick’s ass and the fear really kicked in.

“Jay! Lube! Condom! Please! You can’t just—”

But he did. He lowered Dick onto his cock, dragging out a scream. No preparation. No warning. Just agonizing punishment.

And god if it didn’t make Dick hot.

Dick wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck and dug his heels into Jason’s back, as if they could hold him in place. It was hardly necessary. Jason had no intention of letting him go. He lifted Dick just enough to position himself better, then let gravity do the work, plunging himself as deep as he could go. It was all Dick could do to dig his nails into Jason’s back and bite his lip to keep from letting out an embarrassing scream.

“Imagine if the little brat could see you now,” Jason whispered in a low growl just next to Dick’s ear. “His big brother. His mentor. His Batman.”

Another rough thrust forced a strained moan from Dick. He held his eyes shut, fighting back hot tears of ecstasy.

“My bitch.”

And Dick was pushed over the edge. He released his lip and a shocked cry was drawn from him as Jason set a punishing pace, pounding his too-big member against Dick’s prostate over and over. The pain, threat of embarrassment, and pleasure were overwhelming. Overstimulating. It hurt, but Dick was living for that pain. For that dangerous promise of more to come. Jason was such a brutal person. Powerful. Commanding. If he asked for it, Dick would do just about anything.

The overstimulation led to Dick coming between them. Jason smirked and the simple sound was enough to warm Dick further with affection. Cocky, brutal, rude, and starved for attention. Jason wasn’t hard to read. Wasn’t hard to love.

He finished after a few more thrusts, each one making Dick moan, forced to ride out past his own orgasm. Jason kept him pinned to the wall as he spilled inside, still not even caring that he didn’t have a condom on. Cleanup was going to be a nightmare, and Jason liked keeping his things immaculate (maybe that courtesy didn’t extend to Dick…).

Eventually the strain became enough that Jason pressed his forehead against the wall by Dick and slumped enough to let Dick’s feet touch the floor. “Feeling a little better?” Dick wondered, taking his hands off Jason’s back and raking them gently through his hair. “You’re so difficult.”

Jason scoffed. “This…This is really bad…”

Dick tugged at his hair teasingly. “It’s a little unorthodox, maybe, but I think this is pretty good.”

“No. Fuck. You’re fucking…you’re great. That’s the problem.”

“What’s the prob—” Dick nearly bit his tongue as Jason straightened up again. His cock was still in Dick, just as hard as ever. “Ah. Ahhh yeah, no, this is a little—”

Strength renewed, Jason had Dick off his feet again.

“Nngh! Jay Jay Jay, please wait!”

“Why should I? You’re the idiot who came over to get fucked.”

Another thrust and Dick actually yelped.

“This isn’t fair! Owowow!” He wrapped his legs around Jason again, desperately trying to hold himself up a little higher to avoid the full extent of Jason’s assault. “Please wait!”

Jason took a step back and Dick gasped as his back was no longer pressed against the wall. He clung to Jason’s back again, moaning deeply as the shock of the movement had Jason’s cock grinding against his sweet spot. His own member was getting stiffer between them.

“You…you look good,” Jason muttered, carrying Dick over to the couch where he carefully laid him out, never breaking their connection as he pinned Dick under him. “Why do you look so good?”

Dick blushed at the compliment, which only made the heat in his face more intense. He couldn’t handle much more of this. As much as he wanted Jason to fuck him into next week in theory, he’d break long before that could happen. “Jay. Gently! Please!”

“If you insist.”

Jason pulled out much slower, letting Dick feel every inch of drag going past his hole. His head lolled back, mouth agape at the sensation. Jason took the opportunity to press his lips just next to Dick’s Adam’s apple, kissing and sucking at the spot, creating a little bruise for him to worry between his teeth gently.

Then he slammed his hips forward, forcing himself back in too quickly and making Dick scream. The sound went straight to his cock, if even possible, making him harder. Ivy’s drug was dangerous. If he wasn’t careful, he was going to break Dick and leave things irreparable between them.

“M-more!”

The pleading moan coupled with that one word was enough to make Jason forget his concerns. Forget Dick’s earlier pleas. He braced his hands on either side of Dick’s head as he desperately sought out his next orgasm.

This time, when it looked like Dick was too far gone—when his face was completely wrecked and his cock was leaking, threatening to spill over, Jason’s hand wrapped around it and squeezed it a little too tight.

“Nnno! Jay! Jay I can’t! Ah!”

“With me this time,” Jason managed to grunt out, never letting up. “Just a bit more.”

Dick dug his nails into Jason’s back again and the pain only made him more excited. More hungry. A couple minutes of Dick all but mewling as he begged for release and Jason let go, allowing Dick to come just as he finished deep inside of him, further filling the man with his cum.

After a few strained spurts, Dick laid boneless under Jason, waiting for the bigger man to pull out and worry about cleaning the place up.

But Jason was still rock hard inside of him.

“Fuck, Jay, I really can’t,” Dick noted, shifting uncomfortably under his weight. “I’m not a machine.”

Jason nodded and pulled out so suddenly that Dick let out another moan at the action, which gave Jason pause.

“Okay. Ivy REALLY needs to rethink her stupid pollen,” Dick whined as he pulled himself out from under Jason, who remained mostly still, trying to think straight in spite of the overwhelming arousal he was still feeling. “Whatever happened to becoming her little love slave for a while then dying? Now it’s like the stuff is made to make the victims fuck people to death.”

Jason dropped his head and groaned, finding it difficult to keep his self-control as Dick kept squirming. His bare body still flushed from the heat of their session. On a normal day, with them on equal terms, he’d insist on a shower at this point so that he could get one more load out in a place where clean up would be easy. His abdomen was sticky from Dick’s release. There was surely a mess back at the wall where he’d fucked Dick before. And Dick now had two loads in him. He probably wanted them out. Wanted to feel clean.

But Jason just wanted to pin him down again and take what he needed.

“Jay, you’re looking at me like I’m a pizza and you haven’t eaten in a week,” Dick noted, snapping Jason out of his state of sexual reverie. “Look, I can’t…I can’t really keep up with you like this. But let me help, okay? Just…lay on your back.”

Jason kept his eyes trained on Dick. Wary about the suggestion, he didn’t move.

“You can trust me. It’s okay.”

Jason reluctantly turned over so that he was lying flat on his couch (well, flat save for the obvious speed bump between his legs). “If…if you’re quick, you might be able to lock yourself in the bathroom,” he offered as Dick ran his hand down Jason’s abdomen. “Might…might be the safest bet. You’d just have to wait it out while I get this shit out of my system.”

Dick smiled. “I don’t mind helping. But I’m only human, in spite of popular belief.” He stepped over and settled his knee between Jason’s side and the back of the couch so that he was facing away from him. He stepped up so that his other knee was resting at a similar spot, though not held in place by the couch, and gripped Jason’s cock.

“Nn. This is…different,” Jason noted, eyes fixed on Dick’s pert ass as it rested on his chest.

“Just…do me a favor and don’t mention this to anyone.”

“Mention wha—” Jason tensed as Dick leaned forward, his ass sticking up a little, giving Jason one hell of a view, before something warm and wet enclosed around his cock. “F-fuck!”

Dick chuckled softly, allowing the vibrations in his mouth to tickle Jason’s erection. He hollowed his cheeks and leaned forward more, testing the length in his mouth. The girth had his lips stretched wide as his nose brushed the hair around Jason’s pubis. That was about as far as he could manage comfortably, and that was pretty difficult in itself. But one soft suck and Jason shifted beneath him, moaning at the sensation. Dick took that as approval and proceeded to pull his head back, letting his lips suction softly against the length as his tongue explored what it could. Jason moaned particularly loud when his lips narrowed at the head. He gave one hard suck at the slit, milking Jason as well as he could before letting himself slide back down. Another pitiable groan acting as all the encouragement he needed.

Maybe he couldn’t handle the over stimulation, but his body would only hold out for so long. This way Dick could give Jason pleasure—drive him wild even—and give himself a bit of a break. Sure, blowjobs required a certain amount of effort, but at least he wasn’t fighting through the sensations of absolute pleasure and pain.

Though he supposed Jason was being forced through it all anyways. Just because the pollen was keeping him erect and ready to go didn’t mean he wasn’t feeling all of this just as much as Dick was. He idly considered using Jason’s underworld connections to get some pollen from Ivy that they could use more for this sort of thing…

Then something breached his still sensitive hole. He choked slightly from surprise and tried to lean back, but Jason held his ass in place with one hand while the other toyed with his rim.

“Mmmnn!” Dick wriggled as much as he could with Jason’s firm hold and tried to sit up, to take Jason’s member out of his mouth long enough to talk and tell him to stop, but Jason switched between holding Dick’s ass in place and sliding his hand up along his spine, keeping him hunched over.

“Take it easy. I’m just cleaning you out a bit,” Jason reassured him, pressing two fingers in and scissoring them, coaxing his own spunk out and letting it drip onto his chest. “Fuck, you’re so full…”

Dick’s lips fluttered in an exasperated moan, annoyed but not upset about the stimulation. He did his best to resume his movements up and down Jason’s length, suddenly feeling a little desperate to change positions again. The idea had been to be enticing and flirtatious, not open to another angle of assault.

It quickly became apparent that Dick had messed up. Jason was now jabbing over and over again right at his prostate, ignoring the muffled cries against his cock as he had his fun. Unable to handle the sensation, Dick lurched forward, taking Jason as deep as he could just in time to feel the spray of hot cum at the back of his throat. He swallowed what he could before falling forward, forcing Jason’s cock out of his mouth and fingers out of his ass.

“I feel like I should be upset about that technique,” Jason mumbled as he pulled himself back so that Dick was straddling his stomach in order to sit up on his elbows. “Where’d you learn that?”

Dick keened as he realized that Jason was still, impossibly hard. “Would you believe most of that was learned by Kori?”

Jason laughed. “That explains a lot, actually. I’ll have to tell her she taught you well.”

“H-hey, I get this isn’t anything formal, but I do NOT want to hear you’re still screwing my ex while in this position,” Dick complained as he stepped off of the couch. His knees weren’t keen on keeping him up as he stumbled the moment his feet were under him again. “It’s not a turn on.”

“Hey, Kori’s a walking turn on and an absolute dom. Roy and I were basically putty in her hands.”

Dick grimaced, not wanting to be reminded that his little brother was in a polyamorous team with his best friend and his first love at one point. It wasn’t that it disgusted him, but that he felt possessive of what he had with Jason and…it felt like a betrayal that Roy and Kori had been with Jason before he had.

His gut twisted slightly as he realized that he was jealous of people he loved for having loved someone else first. “You’re…you’re dangerous.”

Jason stroked himself a couple of times and nodded. “You’re the one who showed up looking for a good time.”

“Yeah, about that. How did Harley text me from your phone?”

“I stopped asking questions about that clown when she broke up with the Joker and still went on a murder spree.” He sat up only to grunt and turn his head away. “Look…I wasn’t kidding about locking yourself in the bathroom. I don’t know when this is going to wear off, but if you’re not careful, this won’t be fun for you.”

Dick rolled his eyes. “I’m this deep in anyways.” He straddled Jason, facing him this time, and leaned in close enough to whisper, “The safe word is ‘arsenic’.”

Jason smiled up at Dick and said, “Use it whenever you need to.”

Dick chuckled and repositioned himself on Jason’s cock once again. “Feeling’s mutual.”

***

Jason has just finished cleaning up when Dick stirred on the couch. He went to the kitchen to pour a couple mugs of coffee, filling one with all of the tooth-rotting sugar and cream that he could get in before it had a muddy consistency, and brought them both over to his living room.

“Ooooooh.”

“Welcome back, Dickwad,” Jason said softly, holding the sugary mug out. “You worked pretty hard last night. Thanks for that.”

Dick sat up only to groan loudly. “Fuck me, I don’t think I can stand up.”

Jason scoffed. “I’d be impressed if you could. He sipped at his own coffee and settled down next to Dick. “You’re…you’re screwed. You know that?”

“Oh, is that what happened?” Dick said jokingly as Jason leaned against him a little.

“No… I mean… It’s like you said. I’m dangerous.” He placed a protective hand on Dick’s thigh and added, “I’m a villain. Comeback villain of the year, even.”

Dick rolled his eyes. “You’re also family. You’re also fantastic in bed. And you know, it’s not like I’d be the first person to fall for the enemy. Pretty sure there’s a term Bruce coined for that.

“Catwoman syndrome?”

Dick smirked. “Aww. You’re my Catwoman.”

Jason smiled tiredly and nuzzled against Dick’s shoulder. “And you’re my bitch.”

“Hey.” Dick protested, but smiled all the same, happy to have Jason there with him. “Tell Harley and Ivy thanks.”

“Never.”

GAG REEL!

-In which Jason’s trigger finger was too twitchy-

Jason pressed the release switches on each side of his facemask and barely had the sense to set it on the coffee table. He held the trophy in his hand, gripping it so tightly that he could feel the rough edges of it trying to cut into his palm through the fingerless glove. He was an idiot. He shouldn’t have gone. That was…It was just…

“What’s that?”

The gun was in his hand without a single wasted movement, pointed right at the intruder’s forehead. Before he could think to put it down, his finger had pressed just a little too hard against the trigger and Dick Grayson dropped like a sack of rocks.

“Oh!” Jason set his gun down and looked at the bloody mess in his favorite apartment. “Fuck…Seriously? Why do you always sneak up on the guy with the fucking guns!”

[Grayson? Grayson, report! There was an odd change in your vitals.]

Jason could hear the voice over Dick’s communicator and groaned loudly.

[Todd? Is that you? Report! What is Grayson’s status?]

“Stupid,” Jason blurted out. “He’s fucking stupid is what he is.”

-In which Damian didn’t heed Dick’s warning-

“Imagine if the little brat could see you now,” Jason whispered in a low growl just next to Dick’s ear. “His big brother. His mentor. His Batman.”

Another rough thrust forced a strained moan from Dick. He held his eyes shut, fighting back hot tears of ecstasy.

“My bitch.”

And Dick was pushed over the edge. He released his lip and a shocked cry was drawn from him.

“G-Grayson?”

Dick’s eyes shot open and he slapped Jason’s back in a panic, but the man didn’t bother to let up. “N-no! J-Jay!”

“Todd! S-stop this! You are…you are hurting him!”

Jason let go of Dick with one hand, making the man yelp and cling to him tighter to keep from falling as he was continuously penetrated in spite of their audience. Jason used his free hand to flip Damian off.

“Fuck off, kid. Your brother is busy.”

“H-how dare you!”

“Fuckin’ busy, kid. Unless you want in on this, get out. He’s having a good time.”

“D-Dami!” Dick panted between thrusts, already desperately trying to hold back the orgasm that was threatening to spill over. “Y-y-you weren’t…ngh! You weren’t supposed to—ah!”

Damian bristled like a startled cat and hurried out Jason’s apartment window only seconds before Dick spilled over.

“Y-you…you asshole!”

Jason scoffed. “I DID warn you.”

-In which Jason calls Harley to give her a piece of his mind-

It was the third time the annoying song had played and Harley was ready to chuck her phone out the window, but Ivy had one of her plants hand it to her. “It’s not your alarm. Someone’s calling. Either tell them to piss off or I will.”

Ivy’s sleepy threats were some of Harley’s favorites. The scratchy tone and lilting rage was sexy in ways that she knew said quite a few things about her state of mind, but she didn’t care to look into.

The number was blocked, but apparently it had called six times in the last ten minutes. She sighed and answered it before the ringing could stop. “Thanks for callin’ Gotham City Garage! Please wait while we redirect your—”

[It’s Red Hood, you crazy bitch.]

That made Ivy sit up. She had been curious about the night as well and leaned in against her girlfriend, trying to hear what the grumpy vigilante had to say.

“Hoodie! How’s it goin’? Ya get the little present Ives and I left for ya?”

[Yeah. Potent shit.]

Ivy smiled and leaned closer to the phone. “You’re welcome, bad boy.”

[Right…Look, just don’t bother Nightwing anymore…And how did you message him from my phone?]

“Oh, you were too busy threatening everybody in the buildin’ at the awards ceremony to even notice when I snatched up your phone. I just sent a quick little message to the contact you had labeled as ‘Dat Ass’.” She snickered. “Didn’t know you swung that way, honestly.”

[Right…Well next time you steal from me, I’ll fucking end you.]

“Uh huh. Sure. Anything else you’d like ta say to me?”

There was a long silence between them.

“Mm’kay then! I’m hangin’ up!”

[Wait…]

Harley scrunched her nose at Ivy, having way too much fun with this. “Make it snappy, Hood, I’ve got other obligations to take care of this morning.” She caressed her girlfriend’s face teasingly as she spoke.

[Ivy’s pollen…is it…for sale?]

Ivy had to cover her mouth to keep from smirking.

“Don’t worry, Hoodie. We’ll getcha covered. Don’t call us though. We’ll call you.” She hung up and giggled before rolling up onto Ivy excitedly. “What a cutie! Guess he’s the Comeback villain for a reason!”

Ivy rolled her eyes and stroked her girlfriend’s leg lovingly. “Yeah. I’ll bet there’s some cum on someone’s back.”


End file.
